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Silly jokes

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by March 27, 2018 Highjink
  • The leading source of computer problems is computer solutions.
  • Everyone has the right to be stupid, but some abuse that privilege.
  • War never decides who is right. War only decides who is left. [restrict]
  • If pro is the opposite of con, what would then be the opposite of progress?
  • A train station is where the train stops. A bus station is where the bus stops. On my desk, I have a work station…
  • In books, there hides great knowledge; knowledge is power; power corrupts; corruption is a crime; crime doesn’t pay… basically, if you keep on reading, you’ll end up a beggar.
  • The snorers are always the ones to fall asleep first.
  • They say crime doesn’t pay. So does my current job make me a criminal?
  • If you have been struck by a headache, follow the instructions on the aspirin bottle:
  • KEEP AWAY FROM CHILDREN.
  • Any of us has the capacity to light up a room. Some when they enter, others when they leave it.
  • Pity there’s no gym for your face.
  • Dental-Chair Revelation: Once you have your mouth open, dentists lose the ability to ask questions with a simple yes or no answer.
  • You can go anywhere you like; you must only look serious and carry a clipboard.
  • It may seem like I’m doing nothing, but I’m actively waiting for my problems to disappear.
  • If you’re using the phrase “easy as taking candy from a baby”, try taking candy from a baby.
  • The first five days after the weekend are the toughest.
  • No, I don’t read. The letters get really repetitive after a while.
  • Love life self-help:
  • Oh come on Amor, that’s enough man. Give me the arrow and I’ll do it myself!
  • It only takes 20 years for a liberal to turn into a conservative, without having to change a single idea. [/restrict]

 

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