Putting Away Childish Things

  02 Feb 2018

Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength, while loving someone deeply give you courage. -Lao Tzu

When I went to my first inner healing session as prerequisite for counseling certification, I was apprehensive. Anxiety gripped my body and soul. I was afraid and nervous about what may happen. My hands were sweating big time. I was moving into unknown territory and I was petrified. Surrounded by my classmates made me self-conscious. A pastor/psychologist said to me, “Remember the One who loves you most left his glory to come and save you. He’s here now. He has always been with you. And he will always be with you.” He went on to explain that what I was going through now is to deliver me from painful and hurtful memories that have kept me going round ‘n round the mountain alone. Denial has kept me bound in those hurts.  [restrict]
Inner healing refers to a grassroots counseling among Christians of various denominations. Its principal method is calling up suppressed or hurtful memories in order to deal with them. This is not a one time deal. From the day of my first session, I am still processing some of the things that are provoked by triggers (stimuli). Paul refers to this process as the ‘new creation’. Just because we become a believer and are saved by grace through faith in Christ, we’re not free from our past. The first initial inner healing session is like removing the big rock, abandoned by my father. This is the moment of deep inspiration. The ongoing process is like dealing with stones and pebbles, twigs, thistles and weeds. This may not be as inspiring but it is changing our self-concept. Prayer journal, I have found to be so helpful. You can look back and see where you were a month ago or a year ago and where you are now. You will see the difference. There’s no quick and easy way to a full life. If you take shortcuts, you may be ambushed and may have to go back to the main road on which you began.
Personal sign that quickens me to pull weeds or remove thistles and pebbles is when I find myself on a defensive side. That’s when I know it’s time for self-examination: Ngera me kemla mechesngoi? David cried, “Why are you so downcast O my soul? Why so disturbed within me?.. Deep calls to deep in the roar of your waterfalls; all your waves and breakers have swept over.”
Without renewing our mind (to trust love) we remain childish, selfish, and quite egocentric. A combination of emotional and spiritual immaturity. Egocentricity is caring too much about herself or himself and not about other people. They look down on others and blame the whole world for every wrong. Some are so subtle using God for self-actualization appearing to have it quite together with stiff shoulders and fake smile as if God doesn’t see your heart. Wearing a mask of perfection as superhuman is the infamous face of toxic shame.
The truth is to be Christlike is to be human.
We’re to be more childlike in our faith, humility, acceptance, and openness to others. [/restrict]